When music stars get away with soul-selling commercials

Chance the Rapper joining up with Kit-Kat and singing their new jingle sounds like career suicide but somehow, he pulls it off. Hes not the only one

Forty-five seconds into the final track of his mixtape Colouring Book, Chance the Rapper emphatically states, Ive got some ideas that you gotta see. Given that this comes at the conclusion of one of 2016s most exciting albums, youd be forgiven for getting very excited indeed about this.

Turns out that one of those ideas was make a Kit-Kat advert.

Kit Kat (@Kit_Kat_Break)

.@chancetherapper + @Kit_Kat_Break = Chance the WRAPPER! #PressPlay #KitKatBreak #HalloweenBreak pic.twitter.com/ap8GzdPnKc

October 4, 2016

Worse, its a Kit-Kat advert where Chance the Rapper appears on a Kit-Kat wrapper as a character named Chance the Wrapper. He even has the words Chance the Wrapper written next to him, to better underline the genius of the ad man who presumably shrugged out the idea while sitting on the toilet one afternoon before going on holiday for a month.

It is a bad advert, as horrible and hacky in its conception as any commercial you will ever see. But somehow, miraculously, Chance the Rapper pulls it off. His expression, caught somewhere between I have no idea whats going on and Lets get this over with so I can nap, sells the advert perfectly. Victory from the jaws of defeat. Talk about counting your blessings.

However, Chance isnt the only musician to force through a commercial on the power of their charisma alone. He can now join the ranks of these icons.

David Bowie and Tina Turner Pepsi

When David Bowie died earlier this year, thousands of his videos were shared. This was not one of them. A Pepsi commercial with an incredibly dubious message pour Pepsi on your computer and youll create a hellish AI Tina Turner robot wholl scream at you until you end up surrounded by fire its nevertheless saved by Bowies dedication to his role. Truly, he gives it everything.

Drake T-Mobile

Curse Drake and his genial unflappability. Try and imagine an advert where a Kanye West video gets interrupted by some corporate heels, who ask him to amend the lyrics to Ultralight Beam in order to better comply with a brands profile. That advert would consist of a 20-minute rant, taking the form of a single run-on sentence, that would largely exist in order to allow West to compare himself to Steve Jobs again. But Drake? A smile, a shrug and the world is his.

John Lydon Mountain Dew

Hes arguably more famous for looking constipated next to some butter, but John Lydons first foray into advertising felt like a perfect encapsulation of the 1990s. The product? Sickly luminous muck. The visuals? Dunderheaded extreme sports. The music? Johnny Rotten singing an updated version of Get Your Kicks on Route 66 that unfathomably contains references to Montenegro. Well done, everyone.

Ringo Starr Pizza Hut

This is possibly the most toe-curling of all commercial premises Ringo Starr attempts to get the Beatles back together, but only so they can eat delicious stuffed crust pizzas together. But lets cut Ringo a break. Look at him, the poor guy. Delivering his lines like hes phonetically repeating them back to an exasperated assistant director. Waving his hands around like hes trying to shoo away a flower-seller at a restaurant. Hitting his drum like hes just fallen asleep on it. Ringo Starr gets a pass for this one, because he barely even counts as a participant.

Rick Ross Nike

Despite starring in a commercial for a sportswear brand, Rick Ross manages to retain his basic integrity in three key ways. First, he doesnt actually take part in any sport, instead preferring to simply stroll down a road to see a jeweler. Second, he limits himself to one word boom that has no discernible connection to the brand. Finally, he ends up buying a chain of himself wearing a chain, and the chain can talk.

David Bowie again Vittel

Having learned his lesson from the Tina Turner debacle, Bowie decided to stick firmly to bottled water, as evidenced in this advert where Bowie encounters all of his old personas one by one. A horrible advert, yes, but at least David Bowie knows that its important to remain hydrated when youre fleeing a labyrinthine hellscape of all your past regrets.

Read more: https://www.theguardian.com/music/2016/oct/06/chance-the-rapper-kit-kat-commercial-david-bowie-drake

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