The music industrys blowout season is upon us, and with that comes the rumors from a Jay Z-Beyonce duet to another Frank Ocean LP. Lets debunk and dissect
Were a month away from Q4 the music industrys traditional big album blowout season. There are some certainties this year: Lady Gagas album is already scheduled for October, Bubls got the Christmas stocking filler market sewn up and Emeli Sands filling in for Adele again. But what of the surprises? Where are the collaborative curios? The surprise album drops? The tabloid-fuelled pop operas? Below youll find five potential oddities that range from the almost certain to the yeah, but imagine though.
Beyonc and Jay Z

Existence rating: about as likely as Beyonc being in charge of the TV remotes in the Carter residence.
Taylor Swift

Youll be unsurprised to learn that Taylor Swift is very methodical when it comes to album scheduling. Since her country-tinged, wide-eyed debut was released in 2006, each new opus has arrived two years after the last. Her multi-million-selling proper pop debut 1989 arriving in October 2014, so as darkness approaches so should a new Taylor Swift album. Despite the boss of her label claiming no new album would arrive in 2016 (well, actually, he only says it wont come in October), close personal friend and fully paid up member of the Squad, Gigi Hadid, recently let it slip that Swift was back in the studio. That was then followed by a leaked snippet of what was assumed to be a new song. So what could be fuelling Swifts sudden burst of creativity? While in the past it would be safe to assume there might be a song or two about recent relationships a thinly veiled ode to Calvin, or maybe a knowing lyric about Tom Hiddlestons T-shirt Im keen for a full-blown, multi-layered, wonderfully unhinged pop opera based around the Kim and Kanye drama. Titled Excluded From This Narrative, it will be accompanied by a stage show on Broadway in which all the characters are played by Taylor Swift.
Existence rating: about as likely as Taylor apologising to Katy Perry.
Kanye and Drake

Despite his personality hinting at a God complex that suggests complete unawareness of the existence of other artists/people, Kanyes surprisingly good at collaboration. Watch The Throne his album with Jay Z somehow managed to sound urgent and angry despite mainly being recorded in a posh hotel suite in Paris, while his last few albums have fused together the talents of just about every producer Pitchforks ever mentioned. Earlier this month, Kanye confirmed to Vogue (of course) that he was working on another collaborative album, rumoured to be called Wolves, this time with professional meme artist Drake. Rumours of the albums existence were started in August when Kanye made a surprise appearance on stage at Drakes OVO festival. Is yall ready for this album? Drake asked. I wasnt talking about Pablo. I wasnt talking about Views. I wanna ask yall right now: are yall ready for this album? Its safe to assume that people were indeed ready. Expect the album to touch on universal themes and concepts and in no way be an exercise in glorious naval-gazing set to whichever dancehall rhythm is popular at the time.
Existence rating: about as likely as Rihanna and Drakes relationship lasting one more awkward PDA.
Kanye and Chance The Rapper

Perhaps keen to avoid winding up on Keeping Up With The Kardashians again, Kanyes apparently working on numerous projects simultaneously. In May, Chance The Rapper mentioned a joint album between him and Kanye called Good Ass Job, the title being the final part of Kanyes College Dropout, Late Registration, Graduation album series. Fast forward to September, however, and things havent really progressed. Talking to LAs Power 106 radio show earlier this week, Chance said the pair have at least two songs that could make the album, but that neither of them have had the time to be back in the bunker and be at the spot and have that time to just sit and make stuff everyday. It sounds to me like Chance is just waiting for that call from Kanye. Perhaps hes keeping an eye on his mobile. Maybe, just maybe, if it ever happens they could call themselves wait for it Watch The Phone. No? Okay FINE. Take A Chance On Ye? No? ALRIGHT THEN, WHATEVER.
Existence rating: about as likely as Kanye releasing an album entitled This Includes Three Good Songs, Quite A Bit Of Filler And Im Simply Not Sure Its Good Enough Actually.
Frank Ocean

No offence to part-time carpenter and magazine editor Frank Ocean, but do we really need another album right now? Most people are still digesting the appropriately titled Endless a visual album that takes its cues from watching paint dry and the accompanying Blond(e), a collection of shrugs set to music. According to guitarist Billy Spaceman Patterson, Ocean has hours and hours of unreleased noodles that could in theory arrive at any moment. Theres a lot of stuff that we recorded that I still havent heard yet, Spaceman told Pitchfork. We recorded a lot of music. Apparently sessions could last up to 16 hours at a time, with bits of Spacemans guitar parts appearing in different contexts across both albums. One theory, that Im just formulating as I type, is that a new album could arrive in November given that he previously teased that date when he posted a picture of a library card that time. Perhaps Franks keen to make it a hat trick of albums in 2016 so he can then vanish again for four years and start that carpentry course hes been eyeing up.
Existence rating: about as likely as Frank Ocean teasing a long-awaited album by filming himself constructing a spiral staircase.
Read more: https://www.theguardian.com/music/2016/sep/22/beyonce-kanye-taylor-swift-surprise-album-drop-rumors